Independent Personality Disorder

No man in an island….. does this ring a bell? I happen to disagree with John Donne, the person who laid such a false claim and so confidently at that.Now i do not say that I know all about this world and its workings but if there is one thing that I have learnt from life, it is that, that at the end of the day, it is ‘every man for himself’.

We go on in life thinking and believing with our heart and our soul that the day we need people who matter the most in life, will be around us. However, conditions apply and there, my friend, is that little snag that snatches away all the beauty of this belief.

I have lived a good life till now and I do not really begrudge it for the not-so-merry moments.  I have learnt hard lessons even though i do not credit myself as being a good student. The critical thing that i realised was that many people are a part of our lives, some more esteemed than others. They are a major part of our successes and our strifes; like pillars of our lives and we draw our strength from them all the time. HOWEVER, at the end of the day; at the end of it all…you are on your own no matter what.

Many of my friends and most of my family disagree vehemently with me but we live in a free world so they can’t really do anything about it. But every now and ,they will start quoting examples, hypothetical and real, about how i am so precariously imbalanced in my opinion.

 

you tell me, do we not we live for ourselves first and then for others?  In moments of peril, I can bet, we will think of saving our ass first and then worry if our friend is fine. You have to be an epitome of virtue or a Bollywood actor to be otherwise. 

 

We are raised in a society where it is a sin to be selfish and yet at the end of all the Moral Classes that we had in school, we refuse to behave in any other way but self-centered to sugarcoat the term SELFISH.

 

I accept unflinchingly that I am that much feared word. Yes i am selfish and self centered. I think of myself before anyone else. I look out for me first and then others.  For i hold the firm and unshakeable belief that no one, NO ONE, in this world can love me like, well, ME. And at the end of the day, i am responsible to no one but myself for that is the only person who will stand by me when things turn sour.

 

This sounds like the words of a totally self-obsessed fool who can’t look beyond herself. To the point of being judged I accept that also. For I do not fool myself. I know what I stand up for and it is this that has helped me through many a rough patches. And if it serves me so well , then why not. If it gives me peace, then honestly to hell with you.

~ by ..blue sunride.. on July 21, 2008.